Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Yes, I am alive

Really. I'm here.

Lately I've been having a problem being able to justify the time to write. I'm actually engaged in this job to the point that I don't usually deviate beyond reading Dear Abby every morning. Oh, and an occasional game of Bejeweled.

We are currently in the battle over what to do with Son next year. He missed the cutoff for kindergarten by four lousy days. Four. Being the daughter of a kindergarten/first grade teacher, I am very firmly of the mind that Son would do better to wait for year. I was the older kid in my class (I'm an October birthday myself) and never found it to be an issue. Same thing for my brother, another October birthday. Husband is afraid that Son will feel bad being the oldest, etc. Research that I'm aware of shows that boys tend to be behind the emotional and social curve by about a year until they catch up in the tween years. Son is certainly academically able-but is a really sensitive kid that just needs some more time to mature.

If you can't already tell, Husband is dead set against this. I'm entrenched on the other side. Like Hoffa in the endzone. I've given on so many things that are important to me-the house, the number of kids, different dreams. This decision will affect the rest of Son's life, which I don't think is an understatement. In order for him to be a happy and rounded adult, he needs not only the knowledge and education, but also the social skills and emotional security to function as an adult. Would pushing him into Kindergarten next year be fatal? Probably not-but it will make it a much harder road than it needs to be.

I love this kid so much, and I hate to see him cry. I hate that I seemed to have passed on my perfectionist gene that makes life hard. I hate that he has a father that literally had a master Sargent as a father himself, and that he simply doesn't understand, and is worried more about what people will think, rather than the beautiful kid that we have in front of us.

If anyone has any experiences to share, I'm all ears. I plan on digging in as far as I have to. I'm going to be meeting with his Montessori teacher and the kindergarten teacher at the Montessori to see what we should do. If they can keep him engaged and learning for the next year, we have nothing to lose.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

My brother was the oldest kid in his class because my parents waited an extra year to send him to school. It was the best decision they ever made! He never struggled with homework, he enjoyed social activities, and never felt odd about being the oldest kid.

Anonymous said...

Just my opinion that you are more than fine waiting a year. My daughter is a September birthday and she was more than ready to go but I kept her back. They grow up so fast why not let them enjoy their time - school will be there for many years yet.

By the way, I'm very glad that you are alive, I've missed your updates!
Jen

portrait painter said...

You should give your son a time. A time to enjoy his life as a child. My nephew was at that age when he enter first grade and it took him a while to cope up. You may also ask the child what he wants, after all he is the one who will be going through that situation.