Reason No. 2.395.1 why I will be completely gray in the couple of years.
LMT has decided that the diving board at swimming lessons is the greatest thing in the world. Granted, she calls it a "teeter totter," but she certainly isn't afraid of it. The teacher that we have this session really isn't very good-she doesn't move around the kids very well, and there isn't any real direction. However, since we were 0nly about half the class, she asked if anyone wanted to try to go off of the diving board. The BIG diving board. The one that is in 11 feet of water diving board.
I'm not overly afraid of depths, and fairly confident in my swimming. I still felt a little leery about the whole thing, but since LMT vigorously agreed to go on this little adventure, so I wanted to encourage her. I dutifully went along.
The teacher walked her out onto the end of the board, and then dropped her to me. No mean feat to catch a 30ish pound child while treading water. Even worse when the catcher gets water up her nose. I thought that this was a one time deal-I mean, what child would want to be dangled over water like that?
She did it the first time, and I caught her (she did have a noodle tied around her quite securely, and I had one as well), and swam her over to the side back to the teacher. LMT then demanded that we do it again. The teacher asked me if I was up to it, and I went along with it. She did it again, but this time with even more of a drop. Again, nothing but squeals from LMT, and more water up my nose.
Fortunately for me, the class was over, or otherwise LMT would have been up for a third time. She was so excited and proud of herself. I was proud of her too. Her brother is anything but a risk-taker. It can be hard not to compare them; really hard. But for that moment, just for once, it was all about LMT.
I worry about her dare devil tendencies-the absolute lack of fear. I worry about how she will have to get really hurt before she figures out her limits. I'm thinking about gymnastics to try to channel some of that fearlessness, and at least give her the tools to be safe about it. I'm proud of her, but still have this irrational fear of losing her. I don't want to cloud these types of moments with that fear.
Regardless, it was one of those days that made me so happy that she was mine, that I was able to be there for her, to see her in her glory.
I hope that I can remember that look of sheer joy on her face. The blond curls dripping, the hot pink swimshirt, her pink noodle wrapped around her, and her telling Mama all about it. Please, don't let me forget.